make new friends, but keep the old

my friends know how much i love them.
[at least they should!]

"i dunno what i would do without you guys..."
i've said it so many times that i wouldn't even bother counting.

i like to think that my friends are a second family.
the family that i get to choose.
the family that i'm not just thrown into by God's will.

God knows i kind of have trust issues.
[who doesn't, right?]
the older i get, the harder it is for me to truly let someone in.
however, once i trust you, i'll also love you forever.
[or at least until you break that trust...]

i like my new friends for many different reasons,
but i think the biggest reason is that they're taking the time to get to know me better.
for whatever reason, nothing they've learned about me so far has scared them away.
they're letting me let them in, by letting me in.
[got that? hehe...]
however, i'm excited for the time when my current new friends become part of my old friends.

i truly love my friends,
but my old friends will always have a special place in my heart.
they are the people that have seen me change and grow, because i've changed and grown with them.
they are the people that knew me back when four square was my favorite game.
they are the peope that sang and danced along to the spice girls with me.
they are the people that went through puberty with me.
they are the people that have somehow managed to get me to show the real me,
and still loved me anyway.
they are the people that help remind me of who i am, when i feel like i've lost myself.
they help me remember that no matter how much my style changes, what color my hair is, or where i am in life, the foundation of who i am will always stay the same.
to them, i will always be the katrina they've known and loved for years.

in the past year, there have been times when i've felt completely lost.
there were times when i would take a step back, and not recognize myself at all.
it was then that i turned to my oldest friends.
without fail or falter, they were there...
and they helped me remember myself.
they helped me start loving myself again.

and for that, i can never find the words to truly say how thankful i am for them.
you know who you are.
i love you.